While I was clamouring my desire for the season to hurry up and end within the closing weeks of the season, I must say its been a strange few past weekends without watching my beloved Dover Athletic. Mind you, my lack of current employment means that I've been unable to afford to do any alternate activities since the blue square south season ended. For example, I was really wanting to go to the FA Trophy final the other weekend and one of the play-off finals for the one just gone. Granted that's another football related activity but without that income, i've been unable to enjoy life outside of Dover Athletic.
So I have decided that I will crack on with an end of season review seeing as I have too much spare time on my grubby mitts at the moment. I've been pondering how I would set about doing this and well, I have decided I will try and take you through a game-by-game brief anaylsis through the entire campaign. So please bare with me - this may be quite a dull drag through some of it but i'm a firm believer in that the sole purpose of supporting a football team is to create memories - whether they be positive or negative ones. Why spend so much money and use up your spare time if you've got nothing to remember it by?
If you look back to my mildly entertaining meaty season preview back in August, you will note that I was somewhat optimistic for the season ahead. For the first month or so after THAT 4-0 defeat at Dartford towards the end of 2010/2011 campaign I was full of bitterness and anger that Martin Hayes had been given a new deal after high levels of incompetence that saw us fail to reach the play-offs. This was soured somewhat by the departure of fans favourite Jon Wallis to rivals Dartford having been frozen out by Hayes in favour of far inferior players to him. Things weren't made easier by FA cup heroes Matt Fish and Ross Flitney moving onto to those scummy twats in Medway, along with the talismanic hero Adam Birchall (but we can't blame him for this one - the player that had carried us to the third round of the FA Cup and 7th in the league was always destined for better things).
But my enthusiasm was soon renewed when the arrival of new faces flocked to join our new-look side. Phil Starkey joined having been a near ever-present in Braintree's title winning side, highly-rated strikers Billy Bricknell and George Purcell arrived from Chelmsford and York City while everybody was creaming their paints over the arrival of the triumviate from recently deceased Rushden & Diamonds (ha-ha!); Shane Huke, Michael Corcoron and Matt Johnson. On early pre-season showings we rightly got a little bit over-excited. Because of this, I was able to overlook Martin Hayes shortcomings and pray that with a full pre-season behind him he'd be able to lead us to the promised land of the conference premier.
But it only took about 6 games before realising things were not quite rosey. Martin Hayes was soon exposed as a clueless tinkering buffoon which we should have already known and end up being replaced early in the season. Ex Brighton goalscoring supreme Nicky Forster arrived in but was unable to take us into the play-offs after some woeful home form. My prediction of us taking Woking all the way in a title race never came to fruition and instead it was the two Dover players discarded by Hayes - John Wallis and James Rogers - that were key figures in a Dartford side that pushed Woking all the way before deservedly winning the play-offs. All while most of these "exciting new signings" managed to completely flop while being paid on their over-inflated wages.
It wasn't a horrendous season by any means but considering our budget and intent on making a serious title push, it was a very dissapointing one when measured against our expectations. Early FA Cup and Trophy exits also helped contribute towards a very non-descript season that has seen us massively regress since finishing 2nd in the 2009/2010 season.
Anyway, let's get on with this mammoth task of evaluating each and every competitive game of the season.
Pre Season Friendlies
This was the first time I have ever been to every game of our pre-season schedule. The main highlight for me was beating VG Oostende, a team that plies their trade in the Belgium 6th division. We managed to rack up a dozen against them in a 12-1 victory. Rumour has it we booked the wrong Oostende team and were meant to be playing KV of the Belgian 2nd division. But it was great fun anyway - its not every day you get to see your team hit double figures - even if it is against a pub side! The scoreline could have been significantly larger aswell.
Other highlights included beating Stevenage at Crabble (a side that would eventually reach the league one play-offs), trolling the Ebbsfleet stewards at their crumbling shithole of a ground, a new ground visit to East Thurrock - a squalid dump just off of the Dartford tunnel and blowing up several balloons on our jaunt to Billericay.
My least favourite game was playing a strong Arsenal XI side at Crabble which we lost 3-0. While we got to see plenty of future PL stars and we gave ourselves a good account against them, it was being outnumbered at home by Arsenal fans within our own town that made me physically feel sick. It was an experience i'd rather not suffer through again, thank you.
Dover Athletic 4-0 Dorchester Town (Saturday 13th August 2011)
Woaaahh! This one feels like a life-time ago. I have to be honest I really can't remember much of this one, in fact i've had to check the official website to see who actually scored for us! Normally I have a telepathic memory when it comes to remembering goalscorers, when goals were scored etc but this game has completely slipped off of my radar. It probably doesn't help that for the first few months of the season we had nobody filming our home games. Thankfully James79 filled in after a few months but I could do with seeing this one visually to jog my memory.
Anyway, we continued our record of not losing on the opening day since 2001 with a comfortable win against Dorchester, who were widely tipped for relegation at the time. Braces by Bricknell and Purcell secured the win after we raced into a three goal lead after only 23 minutes. Visually I can only recall one of the goals - a smart finish by George on the edge of the area.
Astonishingly we didn't actually top the table after this thumping - BSS newcomers Tonbridge saw off Maidenhead by the scoreline was while the Champions elect Woking impressively destroyed eventual play-off contestants Sutton at Gangrene Lane with a 5-0 battering. So after the first game my prediction of us going toe-to-toe with Woking for the title looked like it might be a well-measured one.....
Thurrock 0-4 Dover Athletic (Tuesday 16th August 2011)
And that view appeared to be further solidified when we both won our respective games in the second round of fixtures, when we overtook them at the summit after easily seeing off whipping boys Thurrock at Ship Lane.
We've always fared reasonably well against Thurrock, our last three away fixtures there before this game read as Thurrock 0-3 Dover (when we were two leagues below), Thurrock 0-2 Dover and Thurrock 2-7 Dover (Birchall netting five in last season's extraodinary game). So this was always a fixture I looked forward to, and it was made into quite a messy one on the coach journey as it was Russell's birthday.
We didn't actually really get going in the first half until we took the lead against the run of play on the stroke of half-time when Harry Baker smartly finished on the edge of the area after a break-a-way moves. While at half-time everybody got to take their pictures with everybody's favourite England captain John Terry who was watching his equally odious ginger brother.
Just after half-time we ran riot with 3 goals in quick succession. First of all Bricknell headed in at the far post after a great cross by I'anson, then Baker got his second with a stupendous half-volley just inside the area which flew sweetly into the top corner.
If that was an early GOTS contender then Purcell out-did him a few minutes later when he picked up the ball, ran and unleashed a 35 yard thunderbolt that almost busted the net.
So it turned out to be another great evening at friendly little Thurrock and we went back into White Cliffs County chuffed that operation piss-this-tinpot league was well underway.
Truro City 1-0 Dover Athletic (Saturday 20th August 2011)
The away game that everybody in the league was ejaculating their pants over. Truro became the first Cornish team to get promoted up to Step 6 in the English pyramid and we could not have wished for a better time to go there - right in the height of summer, thus setting up a dream weekend in Newquay. If you wish to re-visit my epic blog-a-thon from that weekender then feel free to do so. Because I can't be arsed to go through with all the off-the-field antics right here.
A fine weekend was only soured by a turgid game of a football which we lost because of three main factors. 1) Lee Hook was injured and had to be replaced by the absolute clown known as Ross Kitteridge. He allowed a weak shot to go underneath his palm in the only goal of the game. 2) A cheating cunt of a referee that sent off Tom Wynter for absolutely no reason and 3) We were just off the pace throughout most of it and never really threatened.
Truro itself though seemed like a fantastic little city with some great pubs and they were very hospitable to 150ish of us that travelled down. The weather couldn't have been better for the occasion either. The only real negative was that their ground is pretty poor except the seated stand they have behind one of the goals. But I can't wait to go back there next season and hopefully the fixture gods will kindly put it in a more favourable month again.
Dover Athletic 2-2 Dartford (Tuesday 23rd August 2011)
The fixture gods were not so kind to us with our Kentish derbies though with most of ours coming mid-week or early on in the season. Still, near 1500 turned up to watch a very entertaining game at Crabble in an excellent local derby atmosphere. This was one of the few very rare occasions of being a great advert for BSS football.
Dartford were the better side throughout most of it though and in all honestly we were lucky to get a draw. Mikhail Ruiz was signed as an emergency goalkeeper after Ross's horrendous howler at the weekend. But he also made an error as Charlie Sheringham gave them an early lead.
Purcell continued his goalscoring exploits with a superb effort out of nothing, a beautiful curling effort that caught Young off of his line. Such a shame we didn't have highlights at this stage.
Then we were denied a blatant penalty when Young hauled down one of our players in the box which could have completely changed the complex of the game. That decision was evened out though when Sheringham was wrongly ruled offside with a header. But luckily for them, Bradbrook put them in front just before half-time.
Thankfully Bricknell equalized not long into the second-half with some fine footwork and an empthatic finish in the box and both sides ended up sharing the spoils after withstanding some late pressure from Dirtford.
Overall a pleasant evening, a fine game of soccer and it was good to catch up with my new best Dartford pal Grassbank, a sign that our rivalry has gone too soft recently.
Dover Athletic 0-0 Tonbridge Angels (Saturday 27th August 2011)
Whereas this derby was the most non-descript game of the entire season. I can't recall a singular moment from the game? Tonbridge took a shockingly poor following (about 70 for their cup final) and the atmosphere was just flat. Thankfully the spice between the two sides would we re-ignited at Longmead later on in the season....
Sutton United 0-0 Dover Athletic (Monday 29th August 2011)
This was my first visit to Gander Green Lane and most of the day was an entire borefest. It was nice re-acquanting with the lovely Sutton Sal for some post match beers but sadly another complete non-event of a football match complete dampened the day.
Hayes thought it would be a fabolous idea of tinkering completely with the side (again) and hilarious claimed after the game that he still had no idea of what his best starting 11 was. What the fuck was pre-season for then you dufus?
I hated their ground, thought it was horrible. We had Ruiz to thank here when he made an incredible double-save late on to preserve a point for us. We had created very little throughout the game but a point was fair.
Also this day gave birth to the horrendous "we're the black and white army" seven nation army song so it will definately be one to forget!
Chelmsford 2-3 Dover Athletic (Saturday 3rd September 2011)
After spending much of the week slagging off Hayes we seemingly managed to get back on track with a terrific win over one of the early pre-season favourites.
This was on the weekend of that cringeworthy "non-league day" patronizing shite but fortunately it meant our game didn't kick off until 3.30pm, allowing us an extra half hour drinking time on what was a very messy day. Chelmsford has some great pubs by its train station and we took advantage of that. I also got to appear in the matchday programme if you revert back to my blog for this game.
Harry Baker gave us such an early lead that I missed it as I was trying to tie my flag up at their horrid athletics track ground. But Dave Rainford cancelled that out almost immedietly from the spo.
Purcell put us back in front not long after though with a delicate chip after racing onto a defensive mistake. Bricknell put a two goal gap against his former club with a close-range scramble and then Ruiz gained cult-like status by saving a late penalty. They did manage to score from the resulting corner but we managed to hold out for a well-deserved win. One of the best away days from last season, that's fo 'sho
Dover Athletic 0-0 Basingstoke Town (Saturday 10th September 2011)
Instead of building on our excellent win seven days prior to this game we played out another yawn-inducing borefest at Crabble. It could have been worse had Ruiz not kept the visitors at bay while Bricknell spurned a golden chance to get us all three points. Another complete non-event.
I can remember having a terrific evening on the karaoke at the Old Endeavour when Phil Palmer got absolutely PhilPalmer'd, but thats about as far as my memory stretches for this one.
Woking 3-1 Dover Athletic (Saturday 17th September 2011)
This game will forever live in my memory but sadly for all the wrong reasons. The night before the game we discovered that Dave Bell, a good friend of mine and one of Dover's most loved supporters had died. Just thinking back to hearing the news still makes me feel numb now. I'm sure I speak for everyone else who knew him when I say we still dearly miss him and that it isn't the same without him. When we've re-visited places this season where I have been with Dave before the memories all come flooding back. R.I.P Dave.
Understandably the atmosphere on the train and throughout most of the day was an eerie one but we still attempted to enjoy ourselves with a massive drinking session before and after the game in one of our favourite away day pubs in the Sovereigns with many of the Wokings fans I know aswell as some Dartford fans on their way to Basingstoke. It got very NAWTY!
As for the game itself; we actually gave a good account of ourselves against the champions elect and things could have turned out very different. Sadly Ruiz had an absolute mare and was completey at fault for their opener but Steve Watt managed to equalize mid-way through the first half after a very cleverly worked free-kick.
Had George Purcell not squandered the easy one-on-one about 15 minutes from time we could have nicked all 3 points. But instead we catapulted with some disastrous defending and Woking got one on the break before seeing the game off after another Ruiz clanger.
The highlight of the day? Singing Dave Bell's name for ten minutes after the game had ended with no home fans or anyone on the pitch in sight.
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| Gone, but never forgotten. |
Dover Athletic 0-0 Farnborough (Tuesday 20th September)
I don't think I've ever been wrecked before a midweek home game before this game. But an early start with Champ changed all that which left me very emotional on the evening where Dave Bell would have his minute silence observed in his memory.
Despite a loud home atmosphere from us guys our players failed to respond as we played out our third goalless draw at Crabble in an extremely dull game of very few chances. And this was against a really poor Farnborough side that really had struggled to get going in the opening part of the season.
So after the game the pressure really heaped on our clueless buffoon of a manager and some strong words were exchanged between some of our supporters and the dugout, actually leading to one of our fans receiving a life-ban in which seemed a very harsh course of action by the club.
Dover Athletic 1-1 Havant & Waterlooville (Saturday 24th September)
This game took place a day after my birthday and thus I was the subject of numerous free drinks, which was very nice. Sadly having a bloody leap year in 2012 means that I will avoid having a game on my birthday next season which I have been waiting to have for ages. Turning 15 in 2006 at home to Corinthian Casuals was the last time I had the pleasure.
But even more notably this would turn out to be Martin Hayes last game for the club thankfully as he got released of his duties after another dour draw at Crabble, in which we were fortunate to rescue a point late on with a Donovan Simmonds goal (also one of the least celebrated goals in history). But it seemed like JP already had plans to ditch the man with Nicky Forster being allegedly being spotted at this very game. By the following Saturday he had been appointed the new Dover manager. And thus a new breath of optimism breeded around the terraces with our desire to get rid of Martin Hayes finally coming to fruition.
Sadly the damage Martin Hayes has done to the club in his spell will take a lot of time to repair. Had Adam Birchall not carried us to the third round of the FA Cup he would have been picking up his P45 a helluva long time before this. But the decision to keep him on last summer would prove to be too costly.
Dover Athletic 3-0 Carlshalton Athletic [FAC] (Saturday 1st October)
Forster's reign as manager began with a very comfortable win against Ryman Premier side Carlshalton, in which was a very low-key affair. A brace by Billy Bricknell and late goal by Sam Cutler saw us through to the third qualifiying round.
I have to be honest, I can't remember much about the game or the day other than being dissapointed with the small crowd turnout to welcome our new boss.
Welling United 0-0 Dover Athletic (Saturday 8th October)
So Foz's first league game in charge could not have been much tougher; an away fixture against old rivals Welling who would eventually lose in the play-off final and only lost 1 league game at home all season.
But we could feel aggrieved to have only got a point here when Billy Bricknell had a second-half header wrongfully chalked offside.
This was quite entertaining for a goalless draw though. Welling dominated us for the first 45 minutes but couldn't find an opening while the second half was much more end-to-end but neither side could make a breakthrough.
Another very enjoyable day on the piss though, regardless of the negative bollocks I hear about their pubs. We also managed to make quite a racket in the back of their seated stand, which makes a change as its normally hard to get an atmosphere going at the San Siro.
Maidstone United 3-6 Dover Athletic [KSC] (Wednesday 12th October)
Well this was the only game I missed in the entire seasons and it looks like I missed an absolute cracker as 9 goals were shared between the sides at Shittingbourne's horrid ground. Looking at the highlights for this it seems Ross Kitteridge had one of his blinders!
Dover Athletic 3-1 Wroxham [FAC] (Saturday 15th October)
In the lead up to the game here I made plenty of jokes about welcoming the ex football league giants from North Wales but this side was actually some plucky tinpot outfit in East Anglia. We thought that this game would be a good opportunity to rack up a cricket score and boost our squad's morale.
But no, the villagers had other ideas and playing in the biggest game of their entire lives, took the lead after ten minutes. The managed to hold out until just after half-time when Ed Harris levelled the scoreline and looked to be pulling off one of the upsets of the season going into the last ten minutes. But then James Walker and Don Simmonds came off of the bench to nab a goal each and leave the poor visitors heart-broken at what could have been.
To be honest, I was quite dissapointed myself that I wouldn't have a mid-week trek to some footballing wasteland.
Dover Athletic 3-1 Thurrock (Saturday 22nd October)
Playing Thurrock is such a boring formality that you know the three points are wrapped up even before a ball has been kicked. Does anybody remember Donovan Simmonds beautiful cross-shot that dinked over their goalkeeper just before half-time? It was akin to Lampard's goal against Barcelona. This goal had totally escaped my memory until I just looked through the match report.
A Walker penalty a few minutes late saw us go into the break with a two goal lead and then Simmonds wrapped up the three points late on. Thurrock did manage to nab a consolation a few minutes from time though.
This was an endictment of how poor some of our fixtures were scheduled completing both fixtures against them so early on in the season. We didn't even play Hampton until March....
Bromley 0-1 Dover Athletic (Tuesday 25th October)
I'm pissed off that we keep playing Bromley away in mid-week. Its a local game and a straight train journey so its annoying we can't play somebody shit like Boreham Wood during the week instead.
But nevertheless, me and Adrian set off ridiculously early to get tanked up in their spoons from about 2.30PM along with the delightful company of our buddy Grassbank from Dartford. Of course my Dad and ginger Jonathan Pring later joined the crowd. But even after a good ten pints the pair of us somehow managed to remain surprisingly sober on this very cold evening.
I missed our opening goal because I was too busy setting up my flags in the oppostie end that we normally always kick off at in the first half when we play at Hayes Lane. So it was sods law I had to spend the first few minutes untying my flags and miss Donovan Simmonds opening goal.
It was the only goal of the game aswell. Shane Huke was mysteriously sent off just after half-time so we had to defend valiantly for the rest of the game to see them off. We managed to cope with their long balls fairly easily in what was a very disciplined performance.
Dover Athletic 0-1 Bath City [FAC] (Saturday 29th October)
I cringed when the FA Cup draw for the fourth qualifiying round came out. A home tie against the Blue Square National basement boys was greeted by most Dover fans with horrid arrogance and under-estimation of our visitiors. I correctly at the time lamented it as a poor draw and got shot down for my view. I was right. And why is everybody obsessed with really boring home times in the qualifiying stages? I want to go to really shitty grounds that i've never been to before or take on one of the blue square premier big boys. Not a boring home time that is very loseable.
This was the first poor performance of Forster's reign as we never really got hold of the game and reverted to terrible hoofball in front of a crowd that seemed significantly larger than the stated 922 figure. Bath were not much better themselves but scored the winner just after half time and that was the end of any chance of repeating our FA Cup heroics from the previous year.
While an away tie at League 2 Dagenham and Redbridge would hardly have got everyone's juices flowing, it would have been a good opportunity to pull off an upset and visit a new ground. Certainly would have put more of a gloss on a non-eventful season.
Dover Athletic 1-0 Weston-Super-Mare (Saturday 5th November 2011)
This was another really turgid affair at Crabble even if we did manage to get three points.
We had to work hard for it though thanks to the disgustingly negative, disgraceful, time-wasting antics from the visitors intent to just park the bus for a point.
So the moment Barry Cogan swept in a cool finish in injury time was definitely a moment to savour and a fine result for the footballing justice gods. Why some teams last season employed such negative tactics against us, a very beatable side, is beyond me.
Maidenhead United 1-4 Dover Athletic (Tuesday 8th November 2011)
Normally I consider mid-week away games to be an inconvenient pain in the arse but this was a great evening and well worth making the trip. It was a funny journey up ripping the piss out of Charlton-supporting Malcolm and me and jared trying and struggling to piss into a coke bottle!
Maidenhead is always a decent away day so it was a shame to be playing them mid-week but that didn't stop me taking advantage of being able to drink on their terraces.
The first half was pretty non-eventful until Donovan Simmonds opened up the scoring as half-time approached with a cool side footed finish after Battieipedi's long range shot came crashing off of the cross bar.
The home side recovered after the break and equalised but then stupidly gave away a penalty not long after. Jimmy Walker tucked it away, and then added another one with a close-range tap-in after persistent work from Donovan Simmonds. And just as we were moving around to get closer to the exit, Harry Baker added a fourth deep in injury time with a well-hit half volley, after a laughable mis-hit cross by loanee Leon Redwood (remember him?). That capped off a great evening spent ripping the piss out of the Maidenhead goalkeeper, the son of David Beasant. "You've let your father down".
Boreham Wood 4-2 Dover Athletic (Saturday 12th November 2011)
Up until this absolute abomination of a game, the early signs of our reign under Forster had been promising. 13 points from his first 5 league games had been a very reasonable return while the newly found partnership of Simmonds and Walker seemed to be prospering. But after this devastating defeat a very poor run of form was in store for us.
Boreham Wood is the away fixture that fans in this league least look forward to but we still took a decent following with us on the train as our plan to drink in the nearby and vastly superior city of St Albans came to light, people were more keen to jump on the gravey train.
And things did go swimmingly well until 5PM. Things actually looked very promising when Harry Baker buried a chance after a few minutes but then we conceded a very soft goal just minutes later with Tom Wynter making a very uncharacteristic slip. And just after 11 minutes the hosts were ahead after more terrible Dover defending.
But things looked to be up when they were reduced to 10 men after only 15 minutes when Walker was hauled down clean through on goal (but outside the box).
Somehow we managed to concede another goal on the stroke of half-time after a horrendous miss-placed short corner that resulted in a very swift counter attack and just after half-time Battiepedi passed a ball accross our own box and their striker greatfully converted the early Christmas gift given to him.
So playing against the worst supported club who have four retards in their stand shouting "wood wood wood" the entire game, in freezing November conditions and finding ourselves 4-1 down playing against 10 men wasn't one of the high points of the season.
We grabbed a consolation with James Walker netting from the spot but the only highlight of the day was the night out in Nottingham afterwards with Russell, Fish and Jason.
Dover Athletic 0-3 Woking (Saturday 19th November 2011)
This was the day I got to greet Dover Athletic's prodigal son, a certain Mr David Leworthy, by presenting him with an award on the pitch before the game for being voted Dover Athletic's greatest player of all time, which was voted by you guys in a highly-entertaining thread on our forum that I ran.
Sadly the goalscoring maestro must have been thinking "what the fuck has happened to this once proud club" as we were swept aside by the eventual champions, who to be fair, put on a masterclass at Crabble. Goals from Dale Binns, Jack King from the spot and a late Elvis Hammond goal after a howler from Ruiz, who reserved one of his rare poor performances for the champions elect once again.
Meeting David Leworthy was and presenting him an award on the crabble turf was an honour and it was great going on the piss with my old mucker Kingfield Ender but footballing wise this was another horrible day and concerning how lacklustre and second rate we looked. But no complaints as we were beaten by a much better side.
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| David Leworthy greets his idol.
Boreham Wood 1-0 Dover Athletic [FA Trophy] (Saturday 26th November 2011)
Just on a completely unrelated note I would like to say this shitty blogger website is a total and utter cunt-flap piece that has mysterious deleted about an hours worth of writing that i've just typed up and thus have to do it all a fucking gain. thanks a fucking bunch you cunts. Now, where were we? I've never really cared much for the saying "be careful what you wish for" but when I was clamouring for an away tie in the FA trophy I was not expecting to travel away to the dullest, shittest club in our own division, a place where we had been embarrassed on a fortnight early. Would we rectify the defensive horror show that we witness in the league fixture? Well, we weren't quite so bad defensively but it was another gutless display that saw us muster up a total of zero shots at the Boreham Wood goal. Their early header was enough to kill us off and we never looked interested in getting back into the game. Its a shame that we didn't look interested in having an FA trophy run because I love the competition personally. We missed out on a home tie against football league giants Cambridge United as a result. I had written up until the end of 2011 but this shitty pathetic excuse of a website is playing up and making it so frustrating for me to re-write the shite I had just spent ages typing out. So instead I am going to have a breather, post this as one part for now and crack on with the rest of it tomorrow. I can't explain how frustrating it is to watch my masterful words just dis-intergrate into nowhere because this pathetic website has no integrity, no class and no fucking idea how to actually work on competent levels. I know its a free service but this is made by google, so I expect fucking better! Rant over. |
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