I woke up on Saturday morning to discover via facebook that it was actually Chris Hunt's birthday so I had to consider the prospect of not being an arsehole through any point of the day. And a good job I planned to arrive in Putney early to allow for plenty of drinkage. I left to get the 9.44 hi-speed train into St Pancras after my father had kindly donated a tenner towards the Fulham entrance fee. The under 21 ticket cost me £25 to sit in the Putney stand so it was actually cheaper than the Crystal Palace game a month back. I wanted to sit in the old Johnny Haynes stand which was £5 a ticket cheaper but Chris wanted to sit in an area of the ground with a better view. Fair enough.
A very un-noteworthy journey into West Scumdon I must say. One thing that annoyed me some smelly old bint deciding to sit next to me on the way up to London with her numerous bags, thus squashing me. There really should be a first class section on these trains to seperate myself from all the regular peasants. What right do people think they have in sitting next to me? Do I look like the kind of person that is approachable? NO.
I had a quick fag outside St Pancras before having to get the tube over to Vauxhall station; about 6 or 7 stops straight down the Victoria line. I used to absolutely hate getting the London underground as I used to have irrational fears after the 7/7 bombings but I don't mind it as much any more. The only nuisance is having to queue up about 10 minutes every time just to buy a ticket. I really should sort myself out an Oyster card and just save all that time and hassle.
The cross over to Vauxhall took about 10/15 minutes and I immedietly crossed the road over to the main rail station and hopped straight onto a train to Putney, which only took about 10 minutes max.
Sadly Hunty was being lazy and had not turned up to greet me from the station, so I agreed to go to the Weatherspoons accross the road and meet him there. I was pleasantly suprised that it only cost £2.30 a pint of Carlsberg in this part of the country but I wasn't pleased by waiting 30 or so minutes on my own while Christopher turned up
Still, it was great to see the ginger birthday boy and we set off to find a pub that would be screening the Liverpool vs United game, so we could continue to be updated on the Suarez/Evra wankfest.
While strolling down the high street we quickly stopped into a mcdonalds for a couple of double cheeseburgers; a much needed refreshment having not eaten at that point. Well I say 'refreshment' but Mcdonalds is always one of those things you eat then immedietly regret putting such rancid garbage down your nozzle.
We did eventually settle on a Fullers pub in the high street, of which I cannot remember the name of. It was pretty packed in there and I wasn't best amused when a pint of Carling came to £3.70. Ok that is the given rate for West London but I wasn't impressed for such a piss-poor lager that was poorly poured, with about an inch of head at the top of it. But awfully poured pints seemed to be a reccurent theme for the day.
We caught the majority of the first half in there before moving onto a Sports bar nearby for the second half. Thankfully we missed the ugly shrek-alike putting Manure two goals ahead while smoking outside although we did hear the roars from outside. Yes, in a pub a few miles between Fulham and Chelsea's ground you still get plenty of glory hunting scum in the area.
This was quite a decent pub for what it was. There were plenty of TV screens in there showing plenty of different sports but obviously mainly focusing on the big one. £3.50 a fosters here was considered 'cheaper' in here but a bottle of strawberry kopperberg for Hunty came to £4.20. Ouch! Some of the barmaids in here though were absolutely cracking in here, as were most of the totty in the area. There was some hideously ugly barmaid/barman though who we genuinely couldn't work out what sex it was.
Chris bought me and him another kopperberg in here despite me being eager to move onto the ground, an instinct I eventually would end up regretting not doing. We left this pub with just under 20 minutes before kick off and would end up missing the opening 5 minutes of the match.
It was quite a lovely scenic walk to the ground though, albeit with loads of pedestrian congestion as there were thousands of others leaving it to the last minute. The ground is right by the river Thames so you get a nice walk accross there and through a park. It took a good 15 minutes though and I ended up getting my BRIGHT WHITE trainers caked in really sloppy mud as my temper began to rise.
We actually arrived outside the ground in time for kick-off but would be held up because of the stupid fucking self-scanning machine in the turnstiles that didn't recognise our e-tickets. What ever happened to the good old fashioned human-beings operating on the turnstiles? I hadn't had a problem with E-tickets at Crystal Palace or Birmingham but for some reason they decided not to work here and we had to wait a good few minutes before somebody could help us out and manually let us into the ground.
By the time we got into Craven Cottage we were also both desperate for a piss after vast amounts of alcohol consumed so by the time we got inside the ground the game was already well underway and we had to be the annoying arseholes that walked past numerous people, as our seats were right at the bottom of the stand just to the side of the goal.
I was rather impressed by the ground and its certainly amongst one of my favourites that I have been to. With four seperate stands, the ground has a perfect blend of modern and old school, with the rusty Johnny Haynes stand on the right looking ancient. There was also an awesome cricket-pavillion type thing on the corner to the right of me. Certainly a lot cooler than filling the corners into seats.
The ground is very compact and thus would make for a good atmsophere, providing it has the right fans in it. I couldn't quite believe the ground holds 26,000 seats as it feels significantly less than that, although the stand I was in was deceivingly steep. Overall I thought it was a lovely ground and we enjoyed close pitch side views.
As for the football; wow. I actually managed to see a half-decent game as a neutral for once.
I have to admit I rarely keep up with ongoings in the Premier League these days so I was absolutely chuffed to John Arne Riise lining up in a Fulham shirt. He was one of my favourite players from my embarrasing spell as a plastic Liverpool fan, he's a very dependable player that I've always felt is very underrated and he had a good game here.
I was also unaware that Fulham had recently signed Pavel Pobregnyak on loan; a player that I've been very familiar with on football manager and fifa games over the years.
It was great to see other players like Mark Schwarzer, Matthew Upson, Peter Crouch, Damien Duff and the superb Clint Dempsey close up in the flesh.
Fulham played some very nice football going forward in spells and fully deserved their lead when the new Russian lad put them ahead after 15 minutes. He latched onto a Riise pass to sweep in a fine left footed finish into the roof of the net, sending me and Christophere into raptures.
And we only had to wait another 10 minutes before we'd be off our feet again celebrating another goal. It was my third favourite American after Phil Brooks and Kelsea Grammer, Clint Dempsey, who unleashed a superb swerving shot from about 30 yards out. Sorensen did his best to reach it but couldn't and the ball came bouncing off of the cross bar and hit him as it rolled over the line. Sadly for Clint it theoritcally will go down as an own goal but it was a superb hit which he fully deserves the credit for. The Fulham website has a picture of the strike which clearly includes mine and Chris's faces to the bottom left of the screen;
Fulham had a further golden chance in the first half when Damien Duff was denied by Sorensen from close range as Fulham comfortably dominated the first half proceedings. Stoke looked very poor and very suspect defensively, bar Shawcross who looks like a decent player. Most of their play involved hoofing balls long to the inneffective Kenwyne Jones and Peter Crouch, the latter being particularly poor throughout the game.
I was suprised by how even uglier in the flesh he is. He looks like anything but a footballer and the way he runs about is very amusing. A complete freak, bless him.
Also what was ugly was Stoke's style of play, which I have been told on various occasions about it being very direct and cynical. Numerous needless hacks, particularly from Wilson Palacios, prompted a rather amusing but accurate chant of "2-0 to the football team" from the home supporters.
Hunty left the stand a few minutes before half time as he was keen to get a beer in for each of us while I was determined to see as much of the game as I could. And I was pleased he did as the queues behind the stand were horrific. I can understand people needing to go for a piss but it always amazes me how much people are prepared to pay for shitty overpriced food. They were selling hot dogs that looked like they were made out of plastic for £4.50 a go. And people are prepared to queue up for ages to buy them. I just can't understand it.
Indeed, the £4.20 a pint is pretty horrific but when you're on the piss all day its a far bigger neccessity than somebody not being able to go a few hours without food. And even then, I'd be prepared to go without a drink if the queues are too long. I only had one here because Chris kindly offered to get them.
In the second half Stoke came out much stronger and particularly pushed on after Pogrebnyak went off with an ankle injury and that annoying twat Pulis brought on Ricardo Fuller and Jermained Pennant. They looked dangerous from set-pieces as they usually do and it was Shawcross who halved the decifit with a glancing header from the near post. The ball looked like it was heading wide from where we were sat but it was a fantastic connection for the goal.
Stoke could eventually count themselves unlucky not to grab themselves a point as they pressed hard to find a late equaliser. Peter Crouch somehow volley wide from close distance when he should have hit the target and the bombarded the box with plenty of dangerous balls. They were also helped by 5 minutes of injury time which seemed to have been very excessive for a half with very few stoppages. But it was Fulham who should of seen the game off when Dempsey rounded past Sorensen in the final minute, but could only hit the post with the empty goal ahead of him. The angle was fairly tight in fairness.
But the game finished 2-1 to Fulham and was a pretty fair scoreline on reflection, of what was a decent game as neutral games go for me, particularly after the Birmingham score last week. The only letdown here was the atmosphere, which I had suspected would be poor. Fulham were very quiet for the vast majority of the game, other than a small section in the Johnny Haynes stand attempting to get some songs going. Stoke fans to the left of us managed to sell out the majority of their allocation but only really got going for very short periods. I was rather unimpressed by their "delialiah" anthem that everybody seems to rave about.
Our stand was full of ground hoppers and neutrals, or so it seemed. Their wasn't any real sense that the fans were that passioniate and the whole feel of the club is that their a pretty tinpot one that are punching above their level. There were very few replica shirts on display for a premier league ground. While i'm not saying a wearing a club shirt is necessarily a measure of support, it can give an indication.
But overall I quite like Fulham; their harmless and they play football the right way. Good luck to them.
One negative about the ground was the lack of exits, and it took a while to get out of the ground. There was major congestion as we walked back to the town centre; we even had to queue to get through the park gates! But we eventually managed to get into the original weatherspoons, which we decided was the best (cheapest) option to get some beer and grub. We did stop via an argos though, because Chris seemed eager for me to come round his house and play some FIFA, so he bought another xbox controller. I however, was tired and had work the following morning so rejected the idea, even though I felt bad for doing so on his birthday. I instead promised i'll stay round for the rearranged Hampton away game where I can finally meet his few month old son.
We both decided it was GOURMET BURGER time, and this was one of them weatherspoons that very much delivered in quality, with an abundance of monterrey chilli sauce on the beautiful chicken number. I think I managed to neck this one in record time as I had finished up even by the time Chris had not even finished eating his chips.
After finishing in here (where Chris had managed to spill nearly a full bottle of kopperberg) we headed over the road for one more pint in a pub I CAN remember the name of; The Fox and Hounds. This was a pretty decent pub that was screening both Tottenham v Newcastle and Blackpool v Portsmouth games on sky, and the beer only cost around the £3 mark. It also had a heated beer garden with a tv screen too.
It was quite funny in here because some chubby cockney recognised the badge on my Dover jacket. "Oiiiiiiii. Are you boys Dovaaaaaaar?" He then proceeded to explain in his cockney dialect than he and his pal follow Tooting and Mitcham and can remember coming to Crabble. He seemed to be a bit fond of the cricketers pub, which I sadly had to explain to him is a shadow of its former self. He was thick as shit and quite amusing but kept rambling on to us as we tried getting outside for a fag. "Yeah we got loadsaaa munny now, got big investment up 'ere" he said, explaining their new found wealth. I wouldn't mind seeing them up here actually; they have a decent ground and its a good away day. But he was getting bloody irratating as he kept rambling on about "big investments" and enquiring about whether we still had the drum.
Eventually we got rid of him, and soon after I had to bid farewell to Christopher in order to get back to Herne Bay at a reasonable time and thats exactly what I did.
I had to go back a different way this time; via Clapham Junction and London Victoria, plus another fucking bus from Faversham to Herne Bay. I don't know if any of you have been to Clapham Junction but its a right bastard to navigate around, being the largest station in the country. Fortunately my train was only about 10 platforms away for I managed to meet all my connections in time and got back to Herne Bay by about 10PM. As always, the matchday programme kept me from severe boredom on my lonely travel back but I was dissapointed that Fulham didn't list the official away attendances in their matchday programme so I could laugh at some of their pitiful away followings.
Sadly a good day out had a large dampener when I got home. My mum had gone off to Margate with her boyfriend for some sort of music gig and thus left a key behind for me at the local pub she works in. So after retrieving it from this pub that I hate, I was horrified to discover it was a dud key that wouldn't unlock the door. So this meant sitting in a pub for two and a half hours with no money, no drink, no match of the day and a few hours less sleep than planned. Brilliant.
Funnily enough the last time I couldn't get in after an away game was with Chris. For his last game before he joined the army, a 3-1 win away at Chipstead, we stayed in the (old) Old Endeavour til about half 2 in the morning after a lock in. By the time we got back to my house we realised I didn't have a key. We didn't want to awaken
Anyway, it looks like we can finally go back to talking all things DAFC as this horrid weather seems to be behind us (well Herne Bay park this morning has had all the snow cleared overnight and the pitch is very soggy). Sadly I'm working tomorrow so I have to miss this last-minute arranged friendly against Whitstable, and it sadly ruins my attempts to get a 100% attendance record this season, although im going to exclude this and the Maidstone Kent Senior Cup game.
While i've enjoyed being a ground hopping loser over the past month, I just can't wait to get the season going again after a 3 week exile so it will hopefully be a cracker as we welcome some little Cornwall outfit to Crabble. They've had a wildly unpredictable season, beating both us and Dartford and hammering Farnborough 8-1, but have also suffered numerous heavy defeats aswell. They could either be eager beavers or completely jet lagged after travelling their longest distance of the season but I think they're used to the travelling by now. Hopefully it will be a good game but more importantly, a 3 points to get our play-off bid back on track. Heres hoping anyway. I'll see you all in the Old Endeavour from 11AM.
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