Season Officially Over: Dover 0-2 Boreham Wood

Is there any point of me actually writing this blog piece? I could just copy and paste one of my previous two entries and it would be pretty much exactly the same. It was the same the old story of gutless, half-hearted hoofball dross from our squad of players, most of who are either not good enough for this level or don't put the fucking effort or determination in. And even in a number of cases its a combination of the two. (Yeah, I'm looking at you Cogan and Huke).

Well, at least after the past few games everyone had suspected we'd fall to defeat again. I think there was not a single person in our pre-match drinks at the Old Endeavour that was confident we would turn things around after the previous few showings. Not because we're fickle, arsehole-ish fans (unless you beg to differ) but most of us know that our players do not have the ability, the character and the will to get our season back on track. It sounds like cliched nonsense that is normally spouted by sun readers but most of our players just seem like they're happy to pick up their generous wages at the end of every week.



Well, pre-match drinking wise I can't remember much, which I suppose is a good thing. But it was the highlight of the day as always, we've got a really good set of lads (and lasses- Camilla!) which makes the only part of the day worthwhile for home games this season. I was pretty half-cut by the time kick-off arrived, which is not unusual in itself.

Well, what can I say about the soccer? I've only managed to find a 30 second clip to attach above which is probably a good thing, as you cannot see us get humiliated by Boreham fucking Wood for the third time this season.

Another appalling crowd turned up for this dire match, a measly 575 going through the Crabble turnstiles. Very worrying times and an endictment of how fickle our fans are and very strange when you consider we averaged over 800 when we were relegated from the Dr Martens Premier, and over 700 the following season when we finished 2nd bottom of the ryman premier. It really speaks volumes for how bad the football has been the past few seasons and how poorly marketed we have been off the pitch when our crowds have dipped this low.

Those that did turn up made some very decent noise in the first half, singing loudly for the vast majority of the 45 minutes. We made a pact before the game that we would really get the noise going and we were true to our word, despite the inept football on show.
Now for those of you still churning out this "LETS ALL GET BEHIND THE PLAYERS, WE'RE ALL IN IT TOGETHER" bollocks could you please politely stop because we gave it our all on Saturday and the players completely failed to respond to it. How about our players start giving us a reason to sing their fucking names? Its a two-way thing and I'm sick of the constant shite.

Call me a fickle revisionist but we have not really been that great over the past few months at all. At Farnborough we played very well, at Eastleigh we had a really strong first half and at Salisbury we smash and grabbed a late winner in a game that could of gone either way. Our home form has been very 'meh' for entire campaign and you'd be able to count the amount of decent games or performances on one hand. There have been way too many draws against shit teams that are very beatable and we're only now managing to convert those draws into....Losses.
As I've said before, I've watched Dover through shitter times than this and I've seen even more crap players than the current crop we've got but this is the least enjoyable season I have had watching us in the past 9 years. The players just simply look like they don't give a fuck and I crave for the days we had players we were proud of like Hill, Wallis, Schulz, Collin etc. Other than Ruiz, Simpemba, Bricknell (sometimes), Southam (At least he shows some heart) I couldn't really give a flying fuck if I never see the rest of them again.

So yeah, we managed to lose to a well-drilled Boring fucking Wood side for the third time this season thanks to giving two sloppy goals away; one mid-way through the first half and one minutes from time. We were never in the game and at not one single point did we look like scoring. It must of been their most comfortable win of the season. The most depressing thing is that they had absolutely nothing to play for but still outfought us and looked more determined. Absolutely no excuses for that - it was fucking diabolical and even worse than Tuesday night.

Actually, I lied. The most depressing thing about that defeat was that it was to Boreham fucking Wood. A completely pointless club with absolutely zero fans and only riding high because they live off Arsenal Ladies revenue and bring in 35 loanees a season from Premier League/Championship clubs. There really is no charm to them whatsoever and the only tears I would shed if they went bust would be tears of laughter. Fuck off.
(But they are a better side than us, so fair play to them for that)

In the bar (arrived 5 minutes before final whistle AGAIN) I was airing lots of expletives at what I'd just witnessed. I was in a pissed enough state to anticpate some of our players coming in so I could give them some verbal but thankfully I was spared of doing that as Forster kept them behind in the changing rooms for AGEEEES. I did however see legendary ex-white Daniel Braithwaite, unsurprisingly on crutches. At least that saved him the embarrassment of wearing a Boreham Wood shirt but I still told him he was a legend anyway and I would prefer to have him in our team on crutches rather than some of the shite we have wearing our shirt.

I cannot remember fuck all about what happened from here onwards. I know that we went to the Endeavour via the Three Cups and The Bull with Fish, Phil, Russell, Doddy (?), Phil and Dave Waterfield all in tow. I can remember having a conversation with the latter about wrestling, which was really bizzarre. He'd be the person I'd least expect to have a secret fixation on the greatest form of sports entertainment but low and behold he did. I think he told a tale of when he once met the Undertaker before he was worldwide famous but that is as far as I remember.

I know we were meant to be watching some local legend called 'Johnny B' perform at the OE but I don't even have a recollection of going in there. All I remember was waking up on the sofa with a full pizza next to my beached-whale physique and numerous nexts from people asking where the fuck I was and has dissapeared to. To be honest, I don't know! But I couldn't have lasted out very long. I'll just blame the constant emotional stress of following a shit, feeble non-league outfit.

Yeah, sorry for another really shit blog but in my defence I do not really have a lot to work with. Thankfully I blotched most of Saturday's events out of my mind so cannot remember much and I'm sure you're sick and tired of my constant whining and whinging. We all know Cogan is a waste of space. We all know Shane Huke isn't fit to lace Ricky Spiller's boots and we all know that Forster hasn't show that he is up to the job yet. We all know the board have alienated the fans and need to re-build the bridges. We know that we're not going to make the play-offs. We all know this season has been a monumental failure. Why waste even more time talking about it?

Saturday's piece from Tonbridge away will be miles better I can assure you. I already know we will be losing 3-0 thanks to a Frannie Collin brace and a Lee Browning belter, so I am already prepared for the worst. I'm just looking forward to what will prove to be an extremely messy away day at the auld enemy, where we always have a tremendous pub crawl which inevitably ends in people getting thrown out/police escorts/arrests.
Carnage awaits us and I very much look forward to it. (I probably won't be feeling in similar spirits once we have been dicked and turn on our own players but nonetheless I live in hope).

Saturday 31 Mar 2012
Basingstoke	3	-	2	Havant and W
Ogunbote (19) Smart (55) Ogunbote (91 og )			Dolan (34 og) Nanetti (71)		481
Bromley	1	-	0	Weston-S-Mare
Fuseini (63)					676
Dartford	2	-	1	Maidenhead Utd
Harris (46) Erskine (57) Wilkinson (63)			Semakula (64) Hinds (71)		1,069
Dover	0	-	2	Boreham Wood
			Bryant (21) Riza (89)		575
Eastleigh	2	-	1	Eastbourne Borough
Elphick (21) Jordan (61)			Remy (69)		439
Farnborough	1	-	2	Dorchester
Bennet (69)			Dovell (01) Nichols (83)		452
Hampton & Richmond	0	-	0	Sutton Utd
			Downer (86)		669
Salisbury	0	-	0	Welling
					610
Staines Town	1	-	1	Truro City
Wheeler (87)			Yetton (45)
Tonbridge Angels	0	-	0	Chelmsford
					728
Woking	5	-	1	Thurrock
Sole (20) Sole (31) King (64) Betsy (80) Inns (08)			Boylan (65)		1,754

Blue Sq South Table - April 2 2012

Pos		Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	GD	Pts
1		Woking	37	26	6	5	80	35	45	84
2		Dartford	36	23	7	6	82	36	46	76
3		Welling United	37	21	8	8	72	45	27	71
4		Sutton United	37	18	13	6	62	48	14	67
5		Chelmsford	37	17	11	9	61	37	24	62
6		Dover	37	15	13	9	55	42	13	58
7		Basingstoke Town	36	16	10	10	56	45	11	58
8		Boreham Wood	37	15	9	13	55	51	4	54
9		Tonbridge Angels	37	14	11	12	61	55	6	53
10		Dorchester	37	15	7	15	53	56	-3	52
11		Eastleigh	37	14	7	16	52	57	-5	49
12		Weston-S-Mare	37	14	5	18	54	66	-12	47
13		Farnborough	37	13	6	18	47	68	-21	45
14		Salisbury City	36	11	11	14	43	47	-4	44
15		Truro City	37	12	7	18	57	71	-14	43
16		Eastbourne Borough	36	11	9	16	51	58	-7	42
17		Bromley	37	9	12	16	47	61	-14	39
18		Maidenhead United	37	10	8	19	40	64	-24	38
19		Hampton & Richmond	36	8	12	16	48	61	-13	36
20		Staines Town	37	9	9	19	44	58	-14	36
21		Havant and Waterlooville	36	8	11	17	58	69	-11	35
22		Thurrock	37	4	10	23	31	79	-48	22